


I AM

by PantherDolphin



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Abusive Relationships, F/F, Finn and Poe have a kid, Post canon, She’s all grown up now
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-04-28 20:57:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14457600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PantherDolphin/pseuds/PantherDolphin
Summary: When Shara fist met Izzy, they were fresh, first year recruits at the academy. Both women aspired to be pilots. They became instant friends. Shara and Izzy survives grueling classes, countless hours of training, and a handful of sleepless nights crying over boys. One drunk night changed everything for them.Now, things were starting to get out of hand. Sneaking around after lights out used to be fun, now it was tedious and stressful. Shara began avoiding spending time in Izzy’s room because of it, only to have Izzy show up at her door most nights, sometimes refusing to leave until morning.





	I AM

**Author's Note:**

> This is pretty dark. I wanted Shara to have a bad breakup with someone, so I sat down to write, and this came out. It’s still not my best work, but it’s something. I’m trying to work on my story about Shara and her dads, so I felt like posting another of my short pieces I’ve written about her that don’t quite fit into my major plot.

Shara layed in bed while awake, wondering how her life had come to this. She thought she was in love with the person lying in bed next to her, but now, maybe not. She couldn’t keep making excuses and fooling herself anymore. If her Papa could walk away from and oppressive regime that brainwashed him from birth, surely Shara could walk away from a relationship.  
When Shara fist met Izzy, they were fresh, first year recruits at the academy. Both women aspired to be pilots. They became instant friends. Shara and Izzy survives grueling classes, countless hours of training, and a handful of sleepless nights crying over boys. One drunk night changed everything for them.  
After a couple months of hot and heavy dating, they decided to spend their break between semesters together visiting each other’s families. Shara’s parents welcomed them both with open arms. The first part of their break was wonderful. Though, something in the way her Papa looked at Izzy seemed off. Shara now understood why.  
Izzy’s family seemed indifferent to the couple, and even towards Izzy for that matter. The later half of their vacation was less enjoyable. The uncomfortableness of the situation seeming to keep them apart.  
Apparently, about a month without much physical intimacy was enough to drive Izzy mad. She seemed angry a lot, often taking her negative emotions out on Shara. Shara assumes it had something to do with the way Izzy’s parents had treated her, and let it go.  
The following semester was extremely demanding, and Izzy began to fall behind. She was in danger of losing her spot in the flight program, so Shara never questioned her emotional outbursts. Anyone would be upset under those circumstances. Shara needed to be there for her girlfriend.  
When Izzy want d to spend the break before their final semester with her family alone, Shara didn’t argue. It made sense, their relationship must have made her family uncomfortable, and Izzy deserved to spend the time with them stress free. A week into the break, and Izzy showed up unannounced on Shara’s doorstep in tears. Of course Shara let her in. Her Daddy was more than helpful as a source of comfort. His own father never questioned his life choices, though a few family friends were not as accepting. Shara’s Papa, on the other hand, seemed distant, claiming there was just something about Izzy, something very dark.  
Izzy’s emotional outbursts went from long rants and belittling comments to include bits of violence during that break. She mostly just threw things, not really at Shara, but usually in her general direction. Izzy also shoved her around, through Shara really was getting in her way a lot. Sex seem d to be the only thing to calm her down, and it was beginning to lose its fun.  
Now things were starting to get out of hand. Sneaking around after lights out used to be fun, now it was tedious and stressful. Shara began avoiding spending tim in Izzy’s quarters because of it, only to have Izzy show up at her door most nights, sometimes refusing to leave until morning. Playful gestures like a punch to the arm or a light tap on the back of the head because of a joke or dumb comment had become full forced attacks, sometimes leaving Shara with bruises. Izzy yelled at Shara for taking too long with study groups, laughing too loud at someone else’s jokes, or heaven forbid wanting to actually fall asleep while in bed. Life was miserable.  
Shara sat up, feeling the pain in the back of her head. Being thrown against the wall like was not an act of passion. She was oddly thankful for electing to stay in Izzy’s room tonight, it meant she might be able to walk away this time. Shara carefully climbed out of the bunk and quietly dressed herself. A hand reached out, grabbing the fresh bruise on her arm.  
“Why are you going already?” Izzy stammerednout, half asleep.  
“Because I can’t do this anymore,” Shara confessed.  
“We’re not doing anything,” Izzy argued, “I’m too tired for that.”  
“I meant us,” Shara replies, shaking herself free from her captor’s grasp.  
“Whatever,” Izzy yawned, rolling over to face away. “I’ll walk you to class in the morning, love.”  
“No, you won’t,” Shara declared as she walked out the door.  
Shara burst into tears the moment she entered her own quarters, waking her roommate.  
“What happened?” a concerned voice asked.  
“I’m done with her,” Shara sobbed. “I can’t put up with this anymore.”  
“I’m, good for you?” Shara’s roommate replied. “I guess I do t have to knock on my own door now at least. But are you ok?”  
“I’m don’t with her,” Shara said again I. A whisper, this time more for herself. She thought of the words her Papa thought her after rescuing her from the Fisrt Order training base. “I am here. I am me. I am Shara. I AM.”  
With those words, the cold darkness that had surrounded Shara for so long began to dissipate. She added to her phrase, “I am done. I am free.”  
Shara knee there would be a long road ahead of her before finally being able to completely leave Izzy behind, but she had taken the first step. No one would ever hurt her again.


End file.
